Let me be honest with you: having a newborn with colic is tough. Scratch that—it’s exhausting. Add to that the fact that I don’t have a “village” to lean on, and it can feel like i‘m running on fumes every single day. This is my current reality. Holding my crying baby for hours on end, trying everything to soothe him, while my needs take the back seat.
But here’s what I'm doing: I‘m taking care of myself, even if it feels impossible. And no, self-care doesn’t mean a spa day or even a solid eight hours of sleep (though wouldn’t that be nice?). It means small, doable things that can help me feel a little more like myself again, even in the chaos.
If you’re in the trenches right now like I am, here are some tips that are working for me—shared mom-to-mom.
1. Create a Soothing Space for Your Baby (and You)
When my baby was colicky, I felt glued to them, trying every trick to ease their discomfort. Here’s what worked:
• White Noise: Babies with colic often respond well to white noise because it mimics the womb. I used a sound machine and, honestly, it helped both of us calm down.
• Babywearing: A lifesaver. Wearing my baby in a carrier kept them close and comforted while giving me the freedom to walk around and even (gasp) make a cup of tea.
• Rockers or Swings: I know not every baby loves them, but if you find one your baby likes, it’s worth its weight in gold. It gave me 10 minutes to just sit and breathe.
2. Rest Whenever You Can
This one is easier said than done, but hear me out. The old advice to “sleep when the baby sleeps” feels like a joke when you’ve got dishes piling up and laundry overflowing. But trust me, the dishes can wait. Even a quick nap while your baby naps can do wonders for your sanity.
And if naps aren’t in the cards, don’t underestimate the power of lying down for a few minutes and just closing your eyes. It’s not the same as sleep, but it’s something.
3. Simplify Everything
With no village to lean on, I had to get creative about saving time:
• Meal Prep in Minutes: I started keeping easy, grab-and-go snacks like trail mix, yogurt, and fruit ready so I could eat without much effort.
• Grocery Delivery: Game. Changer. If you haven’t tried it, now’s the time.
• Lower Your Standards: Your house doesn’t have to look Instagram-perfect. Give yourself permission to let go of things that aren’t urgent.
4. Practice Tiny Acts of Self-Care
I know it’s hard to even think about taking care of yourself when your baby is crying nonstop, but small moments of self-care can make a big difference:
• 2-Minute Breaks: Put your baby in a safe place (a crib or swing), step away, and take deep breaths. You’ll come back feeling just a little more grounded.
• Skincare Moments: Even washing my face or applying a little moisturizer felt like an accomplishment. These tiny acts reminded me that I mattered, too.
• Stretching: I’d do a couple of stretches while my baby was in the carrier or on the play mat. It helped release tension and made me feel human again.
5. Lean on Technology
When you don’t have a village, technology can be a surprising ally:
• Virtual Support: Join online mom groups or forums where you can vent, get advice, or just feel seen.
• Apps for Soothing Sounds: There are so many free apps with white noise or calming music for babies. Bonus: they help calm you down, too.
• Baby Monitor: A monitor allowed me to step into another room to shower or meditate without worrying about missing something.
6. Focus on What You Need
It’s easy to get caught up in meeting your baby’s needs 24/7 and completely forget about yourself. But remember, you can’t pour from an empty cup. Taking a break doesn’t make you a bad mom—it makes you a better one.
Here are some ways to sneak in what you need:
• Take a bath with your baby. Yes, it’s multitasking, but it’s also relaxing and bonding.
• Play a podcast, audiobook, or music you love while caring for your baby. Staying connected to the outside world helps.
• Let go of guilt. You’re doing your best, and that’s more than enough.
7. Remember: This Won’t Last Forever
When you’re in the thick of it, it feels like the crying, sleepless nights, and endless exhaustion will never end. But one day, your baby will outgrow this phase. Until then, remind yourself that you’re stronger than you feel in this moment.
If there’s one thing I‘m learning, it’s this: you can survive this stage, even without a village. And you don’t have to be perfect—just present.
To every mom reading this: You’re doing an incredible job. Take it one moment at a time, and don’t forget to care for the amazing woman your baby calls “Mom.” You’ve got this.
Do you have tips or tricks that worked for you during the newborn stage? I’d love to hear them—drop them in the comments below!